Capture Your Grief Photo Challenge- Before- October 2014Friday, October 03, 2014
I'm a little behind the times with my challenges- M was ill, and I ended up using my late night "personal" time for sleeping.
My "before" photo is me during my last successful pregnancy, before losing my Bea.
This is me before:
Before I knew that women who did everything right could still have a baby with birth defects.
Before I knew that women in developed America had babies with birth defects.
Before I knew that birth defects didn't always mean a future of surgeries and hospital stays.
Before I knew that you don't have to be a drug addict or an alcoholic to have a baby with birth defects.
Before I knew that there was such an horrific thing as perinatal hospice.
Before I knew that one in four pregnancies will end in loss.
Before I knew that sometimes euthanasia can be practiced passively.
Before I knew that sometimes parents leave the hospital with empty arms.
Before I knew how to retain a calm exterior when I am quaking inside.
Before I knew that the people most interested in your sad stories are usually the ones who you should stay away from.
Before I lost my very, very best friend (32 years, down the drain).
Before I had ever seen a person die.
Before I understood genetics and the probabilities involved in having good genes, and the miraculous thing that is life- so much could go wrong. Each one if us is a miracle.
Before I was who I am now.